A friend of mine is experiencing something. Doctors are unsure if it is “just” Mania (he has a history of bipolar); I personally believe that it is. In my eyes, he has been manic for months, and it is getting to the point that he is beyond out of control. He is at a point where he cannot finish a thought; and he is constantly running around both physically and figuratively. Two weeks ago he was in a coma for three days after smashing his car with the intent of outracing police officers. He is a very smart and ambitious young man with his whole future ahead of him. He and I are in the last semester of our 2 1/2 year long dual masters program (it is really a three year program, but we both shaved a semester off of it). He is so close to the end, and he is single handedly, effortlessly, and unintentionally destroying everything that he has spent the last 2 years building: contacts, relationships, his name, him. I am watching him deteriorate before my eyes, and I am helpless.
As I sit and watch a friend of mine struggle with every being of his body, truly struggle with this monster consuming him; all I can think is, if this disease can randomly take someone as strong as him down, then how is it that I am still standing. How is it that I haven’t been conquered. I know that this may just sound selfish, or as if I am personalizing it for whatever reasons, but this is a fear of mine. I feel like I can be taken at any moment too, without warning, and I am not going to have anyone to come save me; I won’t be able to save me, much like it seems he cannot be helped either.
Hoping that he gets the help that he needs, and that I continue to receive my saving graces.